It looks like the ASUO elections season is starting to heat up, and Cpt. Lesiak hasn’t even made anyone walk the plank yet (his proposed Executive punishment for waste of student dollars). The Students for Responsible Government, a group that has existed for some time, seems rather angry about Tomcat’s article. Here’s what they had to say in an e-mail.

Need something to do while putting off studying for upcoming finals? Well look no further, we have our latest issue online for all of you to read.

Inside:

• Draw-a-Dick winners
• Webstars!
• Bias in the Classroom
• Hate Speech Debate
• Campus Customer Service
• and much more

(We apologize for the delay for the posters. Proper Facebook clearance was needed.)

Download this picture and color in University of Oregon President Richard Lariviere. Submit your colorings/drawings via email to us at ocomment@uoregon.edu or upload it and submit it in the comments section. We have 2 weeks till our next issue comes out, so get in your submissions! First Place will be a Sudsy Tee, and the others will be mystery prizes!

It’s been more than two months since our campus experienced a sudden wave of passion during a Dec. 11 meeting of the Pacifica Forum and actually decided to give it some attention; a stark contrast to last year when this very magazine was covering the Forum and no one cared.

What has ensued is a disaster of epic proportions. It began with protesters meeting and shouting down speaker for their “pro-Nazi” views. The issue then became about safety, with an attack directed toward a student group directly after. Finally, it has evolved into something so hideous, so disgusting it’s almost unbearable to write about. Yes, the Pacifica Forum has become a soap opera.

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Just added a sweet new button for y’all to buy Sudsy Tees from us if you’re not in the direct vicinity. Due to eBay costs and shipping, the price of the shirt is $16.95 when purchased online, but you can use your credit/debit card or Paypal to buy it!

As always, you are also welcome to send us a check for a mere $15, or come down to the office in person and purchase a shirt less the shipping and eBay tax for just $10.

CLICK HERE TO BUY A SUDSY TEE

The fifth annual zombie walk was held on Valentines Day, described as a general screw you to the cliches of the Hallmark Holiday. Bloody festivities started at Pioneer Cemetery, where the organizer laid down the rules, including “Don’t bite anyone, don’t get in the way of traffic, and don’t overcrowd the bars.”

After waiting roughly an hour for stragglers, the horde began its grisly walk to Taylors and the festivities began. If a venue was at capacity, the almost-undead moved on to the next. Walking dead were seen at Diablo’s, John Henry’s, and the Horse Head in addition to the bars around campus.

“Bar’s love us,” remarked a participant, her mouth caked with fake blood made from starch and food coloring. Indeed, Diablo’s had gone out of its way to accommodate the walking dead with skeleton themed decor and DJ’s that played Thriller.

But all good things must end, and by the time the horde left Diablo’s, it had fractured into smaller cells, which quickly split off to go to their own pubs. See all the gruesome action below.

Those lovable scamps down at our campus newspaper, the Daily Emerald, decided to offer up a little Valentine’s Day gift to students by giving out free personal ads to celebrate the holiday. Wanting to fully take advantage of such an offer, the Oregon Commentator decided to run a personal ad of our own, which ran in today’s edition of the Emerald. The image is above, but the text reads:

Let’s meet for a drink

You: Fair skin, temperament to match. Hair and eyebrows like midnight. Powerful. Me: Golden complexion, rotund, a little white on top. Smoking enthusiast. Let’s stop playing games. Be my Valentine.

Anyone want to take a stab at who “You” and “Me” is?

Guess/comment away.

This flier was put in all the student programs’ mailboxes at the end of last week. Indeed, I’m sure some of you may have seen a girl in a big vagina costume walking around campus (someone saw it and told me they initially thought it was some kind of protest, which seems reasonable). Needless to say, the sight is rather odd. Especially when you consider that, by the looks of the drawing on the flier, the costume may be a tad under-contextualized. Some upturned legs or a tuft of hair at the top may do the trick next time.

The “Vaginagram” is a fundraising effort by the Women’s Center for a retreat they want to do. I’m glad to see programs are doing such fundraising (although I have to ask, what money paid for the suit? Also, where the fuck do you buy a big vagina suit?) but to be honest, I’m not so sure a singing vagina really makes that much sense. Who really connects the dots between a singing vagina and a valentine? Also, does the Men’s Center plan on following suit with a big, breakdancing cock?

These are questions I’d like answered. Preferably in song.

I highly recommend buying one of these for your friends. How often does an opportunity like this arise? It’s a no-brainer.

Our latest efforts have led us to the Love/Sex issue, just in time for Valentine’s Day. Love is in the air and also in the pages of our magazine.

Inside

• Stories of lost virginity and dignity
• Evan P. Thomas speaks to the UO administration about the Pacifica Forum
• Dick Origami (Don’t ask just check it out)
• One hell of a flow chart.

Yesterday our blog received its highest one-day traffic count ever. The site received 1,880 views yesterday, mostly due in part to two  wonderous events that, by themselves, are merely disasters.

Of course, I’m talking about  the neverending debacle that is the Pacifica Forum coupled with Daily Emerald sports writer Jonathan Marx ’s decision to run a story accusing beloved campus figure Jeremiah Masoli of stealing.

So, on behalf of the Oregon Commentator, here is staffer Pete Lesiak to present the “Golden Clusterfuck Award” to Marx and the PF respectively.

You deserve it.

Full Disclosure: Unfortunately the OC had a problem with our printer and our issue won’t be out until tomorrow morning. In the meantime, since Cheba Hut paid for an ad for their event on Saturday, we figured we’d throw them a little plug here on the ol’ blog since we’re not well-acquainted enough with this fancy-pants Internet to figure out how to put it on the sidebar.

Cheba Hut, over on 11th and High, is having a big block party type of affair this Saturday the 30th. They’re going to have a raffle and live music, including local Ninkasi-sponsored act Cambio alongside two other bands. The music starts sometime around mid-day, and there will also be a Ranch Dressing-chugging contest to win $100 and free subs for a year.

Sudsy will be there, that’s for sure.

The AHTF is number one in the hood, G.

My name is… Shake zoola, the megaphone rula

You want to picket? I’ll bring it to ya!

Gridlocked and we on top/Rest assured we’ll call the cops/Black Tea you up next with yo’ knock-knocks

Anti-Hate in your grills, G/Anti-Hate made of sugar, see?

We censor the crowd/We get real loud/Sticks up your ass and lots of shouts from the town

Check, check it/Cause we are the Anti-Hate Team

Make the ASUO say ‘ho!’ and the girlies wanna scream

Morality has never been hotter.

There has been a disturbing run of PSA’s on MTV lately (not to mention South Park syndication) that I am sure will throw Nancy Grace into a hissy fit.

Athinline.org is the website the MTV ads are pushing lately, and I’m sure that for some people the website does some good, so I won’t write it off completely. Most confusing about the advertisements, however, is their appearance on MTV itself – a channel which produces constant surveillance of celebrities and promotes the over-sexualization of precarious individuals.

Conversely, the website’s messages of “Anti-Sexting” (sexy-texting for those of you who don’t speak LE3T) and how to counter “Constant Messaging” doesn’t seem to coincide with the basic concept of MTV’s programming.

In any case, I’m glad that MTV has decided in recent years to run seemingly obligational, horribly contrived messages to their younger viewers preaching responsibility. It fits right in.

Now, who’s up for a wet t-shirt contest in Cabo? Spring Break is right around the corner.

As this decade (the Twenty-oughts) comes to a close, the Commentator will inevitably examine the impact of several movements, from politics to pop culture, from the last ten years. In kind, much has happened over the last ten years to the Commentator itself, and I believe it to be important, dear readers, for you to learn about who we were at the turn of the century, if only to better understand who we are today.

Perfecting the Art

Just one month before the turn of the century, the Oregon Commentator was in some relative hot water over a front cover they had ran purporting then University of Oregon President Dave Frohnmayer to have died. Frohnmayer famously had a heart attack at a medical conference in Bethesda, Maryland but had escaped the ordeal relatively unharmed.

At the time, “Das Frohn” was rather upset about the cover, “Quite frankly, he was pissed off,” said then-OC editor Bill Beutler.

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