The Man Issue will be on the stands Monday Nov. 5, but you can check it out right now in pdf form. Inside we rip apart the AK47, do a lot of journalistic finger pointing and aide the good fight against the emasculation of men at the University. If you don’t like it, come tell us to our face.

Contest: The first person to name the lovely couple on page 16 gets a free sudsy tee or tank. (OC staffers cannot win.)

The Oregon Commentator goes newsprint. (Just for one issue.)

Twenty-four year ago today, the first issue of the Oregon Commentator was released. As the current staff swaggers into the OC’s 25th year of existence, we present a re-creation of its original issue; from the original “Radical moderation” to the updated “Radical immoderation.”

For those who don’t care what we have to say and just want to see the pretty pictures we put into our magazines, do not fret. The Man Issue will be released in print no later than Monday, November 4.

The sun was out, and it was a beautiful day. Freshmen girls were out. So was the UO Duck and our most beloved President Frohnmayer. Four brave, valiant warriors carrying a box and a stack of magazines ventured out onto the campus as it sprung to life.

“Who wants a Go Ducks magazine?” we asked. “Also known as the Oregon Commentator.” we carried enlightenment too the campus. The incoming freshmen greedily took stacks of the Commentator when they gazed upon the back cover. Just inside the cover, they were greeted with the phallic depiction of the Obelisk in the quad. Fresh malleable minds. Nothing makes my day more than twisting the first impression of students of the campus. And nothing is more exciting for an OC staffer than Distribution Day.

Amongst the recipients of our disbursement, notables are:

The UO Duck

Freshmen and their parents

Stefanie Loh

And most importantly…our very own President Frohnmayer, whom by the way was hanging out at Rennie’s, not just the cool place for OC staff, but also the cool place for the high echelon of society.

As Editor-In-Chief of the Commentator for the 07-08 school year, I alone take responsibility for the summer issue missing the deadline of today. Everything was looking good and peachy for a 10 p.m. Internet release, until the OC summer staff was booted from the Erb Memorial Union by Mike, the EMU “security,” and Programs Coordinator Liora “Spunky” Sponko, about 19:00 Friday evening. (more…)

It’s finally here. The moment you’ve all been waiting for.

In the left corner we have safety, the ASUO, sissies and the crosswalk on Franklin. *boo, hiss*

And, in the right corner, it’s the issue with issues, the magazineosaurus, the champ, THE HATE ISSUE! *crowd goes nuts*

Y’all ready for this? *cue music*

L-uh-HET’S GET REEAADY TO RUUUUUUMBLE!!!!!!!!!!

*House comes down, pandemonium erupts. Read the fucking issue.*

The Retro Issue is done. Please enjoy it responsibly.

Can’t decide who to vote for in the upcoming ASUO elections? There’s a Commentator for that!

The all-new Elections Issue of the Oregon Commentator is finally done, and has been released for the web in PDF format. Look for the issues on stands around the UO campus early next week.

As always, please enjoy the Commentator responsibly.

The PFC voted today to approve the Executive reccomendation of an 11% decrease for the Commentator’s budget. Despite considerable discussion, the PFC was unwilling to consider either a 2.5% increase, or level funding. The proceedings were strictly by the book, but next year the “Senate Midterm Grades” feature should run sometime after the PFC hearing. Not that the whole affair wasn’t brutally viewpoint neutral. Incidentally, 90% of the Commentator’s budget is printing costs, and an 11% cut will make a noticable dent at a time when we’re distributing over 1,000 issues before the folowing issue comes out. Luckily, we had an incorrigible optimist in Vice Chair Micah Kosasa, who cheered us up to no end by calling it “a bump in the road.”

The whole evening was rendered complete by sitting in on the Survival Center’s budget hearing, where the proud co-directors of a program with an $18,000 budget got all huffy over 50 bucks coming out of the “Community Gardening” line item. “I feel like we asked for something, and it just got sent back,” pouted one Survivalista. So did we, so did we. Best moment of the night (except for the Ty thing, maybe) was the PFC approving a line item marked “Propaganda.”

It’s the only known cure for Seasonal Affective Disorder… and it’s finally here. The Oregon Commentator’s Winter Double Issue has made it’s online debut, and will be arriving on stands later this week. It’s a Lichtenstein/Comic Art inspired pop nugget, chock full of the Commentator humor, analysis and snark that you’ve come to love. So curl up in front of the fire, with a hot, alcoholic drink of your choice, and beat the winter blahs with the best damn rag on campus.

As always, enjoy the Commentator responsibly!

The Oregon Commentator has received a $750 “Balance in Media” grant from the conservative organization, The Leadership Institute. The grant will be used, in part, to complete our computing upgrade.

Thanks L.I.!

This weekend the Commentator received a donation of four computers from Portland-based remote data mirroring firm Miralink. The computers, which had been used in Miralink’s research lab, will combine to provide two systems capable of running Adobe’s Creative Suite with which the Commentator is created (and a couple of “parts boxes” to rust in the front yard). With these new computers, we will be able to ditch the aging g4 and iMac for the new-to-us P4’s from Miralink and a recently-purchased Dual-core monster. Although this does mean that we will now be able to *gasp* simultaneously run Photoshop and InDesign (!), according to Apple’s asinine marketing campaign, it also means that we’ll have to become dull and conventional. Oh Well.

Oh, and we love you Miralink!

Sometimes, in the haze of Winter break, we forget that this moment will come. We forget that our itinerary will soon require us to wake before noon, perform tasks not involving a microwave or XBox, and of course, troop back to our little slice of paradise at EMU 319 for more Commentator slavery. Well, the moment is at hand. Classes start on Monday, and Commentator meetings are set to begin the first week of classes.

We will be gathering to work on business every Tuesday at 6 p.m. at our office on the third floor of the EMU, starting on January 9th. We will be working on the upcoming issue, as well as discussing future issues and ongoing business. Current staff should attend this meeting, or email the Editor in case of a scheduling conflict.

We also encourage anyone who reads and enjoys the Commentator and is interested in helping us out to come by the meeting, or email the Editor at ocomment[at]uoregon.edu. We need help in a number of areas, from reporting to editing, to art and distrobution. We are also looking for candidates to fill leadership positions for next year, so pay some dues now and you just might get to boss people around next year.

Finally, I would like to thank everyone who made fall term so successful for the Commentator, including our writers, artists, editors, advertisers, alumni advisors, and of course, the readers. It is thanks to all of your enthusiasm that we have managed to print three issues this term, more than the Voice and the Insurgent combined (ok, that’s not so impressive). I lift my glass to you all, and ask for your continued support as we try to make your Winter Term a little bit more bearable, one issue at a time.

This Friday, the staff and fans of the Oregon Commentator are invited to a field trip to Mel Gibson’s new movie, Apocalypto. We will be attending the 10:25 pm showing at Cinemark 17 in Springfield, and we encourage anyone interested in enriching their worldview with the wisdom of Mel to attend. The event is strictly BYOF (Bring Your Own Flask), and judging from Mel’s recent work, you will definately need it. Remember, nothing puts ones personal struggles into perspective like the whacked-out visions of neurotic, alcoholic, bat-shit crazy Hollywood stars… and after all, Mel is the reason for the season.

After locking staff into the office at 319 EMU for the weekend, we finally have a brand spanking new issue. Don’t Drink The Kool Aid pays homage to the recent growth of fiscal responsibility in the ASUO with the first Black and White issue of the year. In it, we break down all the myths and madness surrounding the current benchmark debates, and go line by line through the budget to help the PFC make it in under their 2.5% benchmark. For everyone who finds the ASUO immature and amateurish (in other words, everyone), we have an interview with Bill Harbaugh, about his alternate diversity plan and his ethical complaints against Dave Frohnmayer. Oh yeah, and we prove that Dave Frohnmayer lied through his well-preserved teeth in the Daily Emerald. Plus, Leeper tries to get DPS Director Tom Hicks to comment on the recent tasing at UCLA, the return of Not Worthy, and all the usual madness.

As always, please enjoy the Commentator responsibly.

Got those midterm election blues? Overwhelmed by the partisan bickering of petty political hacks? Ask your doctor about the Oregon Commentators Political Smackdown Issue, now available at this fine blog, and coming to boxes around campus next Thursday. In it you’ll find all the OC humor and analysis you’ve come to expect with a healthy dollop of pro-wrestling attitude, and the perfect cure for your apathy… at least untill you’re done reading, after that it’s up to you. Candyass.

As always, please enjoy the Commentator responsibly.