The latest Eugene Weekly has a news piece on the Pacifica Forum, and (surprise!) the forum is still bat-shit crazy. If you haven’t read my piece on the Pacifica Forum in the Holiday Issue, go check it out. Anyways, here’s a little treat from the EW article:

Later, after denying that he was a conspiracy theorist, Douglas described how the burning of the Branch Davidians’ compound in Waco, Texas, and the bombing of the Oklahoma City federal building were perpetrated by the U.S. government, and he said that the U.S. government was capable of using cable TV boxes as receivers to eavesdrop on people in their homes.

For those not familiar with it, the Pacifica Forum spends most of its time talking about how the Jews run the world, didn’t really die in the Holocaust, eat babies, etc. They try and cover their douchebaggery by claiming they are merely criticizing Israel and its policies, which apparently is a rock-solid defense these days.

From a press release just issued to the Daily Emerald and the Register-Guard:

The Oregon Commentator is proud to present its first annual Great American Smoke-in on Friday, Nov.30 from noon to 3 p.m. in the EMU amphitheater.

In response to the ever-increasing vilification of smokers on campus, the Oregon Commentator presents the Great American Smoke-in as an opportunity for students to join together and enjoy the pleasures of fine tobacco products. Says Oregon Commentator Editor-in-Chief Ossie Bladine: “This is really a community event, a chance for smokers to have a safe space and fight the institutional bias against them.”

The Commentator opposes a smoke-free campus and other draconian measures proposed by the Clean Air Project. Bladine says these efforts are part of a larger scheme to “discriminate against and marginalize smokers.” The Great American Smoke-in, says Bladine, is a chance for smokers “to make their voices heard.”

The event will be held, rain or shine, and all forms of tobacco are welcome, including cigarettes, cigarillos, cigars, pipe tobacco and the use of hookahs. Although the Commentator supports the legalization of marijuana, the event is for tobacco products only.

Well, it’s that day of the week again, and there’s a brand new Eugene Weekly on the streets filled to bursting with bizarre rants from Lane County’s finest. I’ve titled this roundup the “historical perspective edition” because several of the letters use the oh-so popular rhetorical device of comparing modern situations to the past … with disastrous results. But before we get to that, let’s start out with Bernard Knickerson’s two-sentence opus:

Every citizen who pays taxes and all the soldiers who follow orders are accomplices to vast and various crimes against humanity. Are all of them either criminals or slaves?

Knickerson has cleverly managed to distill Thoreau’s Civil Disobedience into two, asinine sentences, throwing out all of the sweeping, Romantic language and rhetorical force. I believe in the J-School we call that “AP Style.” More written trainwrecks after the jump. (more…)

On a completely unrelated note, Repeat Offenders is a great R&B / Latin / Blues group from Pheonix. I recommend the song “Respect.”

Well, yesterday was everybody’s favorite day of the week, Thursday, and you know what that means: new Eugene Weekly! And you know what that means: crazy letters to the editor. Yep, when it comes to wingnuttery, kookery and moonbatiness, few publications can hold a candle to EW’s readers.

On a side note, it turns out EW is turning 25 this year, just like the Commentator. We’ll let you, the reader, decide which publication has had a more prestigious and honorable history. Just for comparison, though, EW caused a big flap when they ran bare breasts on their cover; the Oregon Commentator caused a big flap when they ran a big, hairy ass on their cover. We report, you decide.

Anywho, on with the letters. Here’s a small taste of what awaits you after the jump:

I don’t mean to be mean or impeach the impeachment movement, but constitutionally you can’t impeach someone who is not legally in office. I wonder if the court can indict itself for failing to uphold the law of the land.

Wait, Bush isn’t legally in office? Jesus, why didn’t someone say something!? You’d think at least one of the country’s great legal scholars would have caught this after nearly eight years. Man, this is going to be embarrassing! (more…)

Last night’s meeting was an interesting foreshadowing of this coming year in student politics.

I just have a few things that I want to clear up, though…there has been a lot of crap going on behind my back regarding me and writing for the Commentator. I’m not trying to piss anyone off (although it seems to happen quite often) and if anyone has a legitimate concern or complaint, I encourage you to bring it up to me. Otherwise…well…I guess you’re entitled to your opinion.

For the record, I intend on covering ASUO as non-partisan as possible, with a slight bias towards the senators that advocate more fiscal responsibility. However, I won’t hesitate to label anyone or call them out.

The most interesting part of yesterday’s meeting revolved around the appointment of Senate President. It’s clear that Sen. Jones has drifted to the middle of the table and possibly even the other side, although she came in with the Campaign for Change. Some of the senators were getting annoyed at the partisan tensions at the table, but Sen. Warnecke brought up a good point: politics is about debating and the battle of ideas.
He took the awards for “Senator with Most Common Sense” and “Doomcloud” of the meeting.

Other awards of the meeting worth mentioning:
Sen. Boye for “Let’s Just Stop Fighting”
Sen. McKenzie for “This Partisanship is Getting Annoying”
Sen. Rajabzadeh for “Quietest Senator”
Sen. Wilsey for “Most Mind-Controlled” (I have an illustration to go along with it, too…) - By popular request, I have added the illustration:

Sen. Brown and Sen. Gulley tying for “Loudest and Most Talkative”.

Senate should not be afraid of engaging in discourse. Frankly, I believe that it takes that pulling and pushing of different interests to make politics work. The dynamic of the table is now more balanced. With about a 5-6 senators from the ‘programs’ side, a similar number advocating fiscal responsibility, and the rest somewhere in between, there is potential for progress.

But deep down inside, we all know that this is just playtime for the student senators, and whatever goes on the inside…no one cares.

It’s not often you’ll read those words from me, but it should be noted that there is substantially worse student journalism out there. I’m taking some classes at UTSA to get geared up for grad school, and this is what I have to amuse myself with before the chem lecture starts. It makes me miss Mike Kleckner. Oy vey.

In case you didn’t know, Leonardo DiCaprio has a new ecological documentary coming our titled the “11th Hour”. It is supposedly bad. Supremely bad. How bad? Well, when the co-founder of Greenpeace is calling your film a fraud you know that you’ve got a problem on your hands.

As a lifelong environmentalist, I say trees can solve many of the world’s sustainability challenges. Forestry is the most sustainable of all the primary industries that provide us with energy and materials. Rather than cutting fewer trees and using less wood, DiCaprio and Berman ought to promote the growth of more trees and the use of more wood. …

DiCaprio’s movie, The 11th Hour, is another example of anti-forestry scare tactics, this time said to be ‘brilliant and terrifying’ by James Christopher of the London Times.

Shame on you for clicking on this link.

Everyone has heard it at some point. Usually it will be at a lackluster party, in which flagging conversation is suddenly renewed by the topic of everyone’s favorite incitement to promiscuity: Bonobos. You know, as in “oh my God, wouldn’t it be like, sooo great if we could all just solve our problems by fucking instead of fighting? Bonobos kick ass!” But the Bonobo is not just the spirit animal of the conversationally ungifted lech, apparently it has become the mascot of the dreaded “SP” (Secular Progressive) and as such, it must be attacked by those who seek to protect us from the spectre of “G-G rubbing” as a tool of social harmony.

Enter Dinesh D’souza, the guy who blamed 9-11 on liberals, who “debunks the myth of the promiscuous Bonobo”, by way of attacking the crazy lefties who can’t get enough of the horny little buggers.  Although lines like “I’m surprised the Democratic Party hasn’t changed its symbol from the donkey to the bonobo” are good for teh lulz, D’Souza is clearly trying to score culture warrior points by “proving” that Bonobo sexuality is a perversion caused by captivity. And why wouldn’t he, considering that it makes liberals look like bad scientists as well as huge pervs?

Of course there’s no question that D’Souza is willing to blur a few lines in order to make a partisan point, because that’s what he does for a living. What is a little more surprising is that the article he cites is more than a little, erm, lacking in credibility. Frans DeWall, whom D’Souza attacks, responds at Skeptic (NSFW!) with a long, but worth-reading piece giving a nuanced summary of Bonobo behavior, that impresses with it’s balance, proving once again that science with an agenda is no science at all.

Everyone’s buddies at the Recording Industry Association of America are suing 17 UO students for illegaly downloading copywrited material over the Universities network, according to local news reports. Apparently the RIAA asked the University to identify a number of network users, and offer them settlements in their ongoing legal struggle to prevent people from stealing food from Lars Urich’s children. The pre-litigation settlement offers were not forwarded to the John Doe defendants, according to UO General Counsel Randy Gellar.

“It’s our policy not to send those letters along because we are neither the agent of the RIAA or any students,” Geller said. “As far as I know no students have been sued by the RIAA.”

Similar attempts by the RIAA to discover the identity of illegal downloaders on University networks failed at the University of New Mexico earlier this year. Although the UO may pose as the defender of student privacy, it did block network access to as many as 24 students per week last year for illegal downloads on the University network. Thank god someone is looking out for these poor people.

Yesterday CNN hosted its much-hyped YouTube presidential debate with the Democratic candidates. Rather than a traditional moderator, all the questions posed were submitted via YouTube by “average joes” (and a snowman). I guess this was the Internet’s big chance to make good on that whole “democratizing effect” promise we’ve been hearing about for the past ten years or so. Of course, the questions were still screened and selected by CNN, which explains the notable absence of YouTube’s regular fare (crazy Japanese prank shows, people ghostriding the whip and teenagers going out of their minds on salvia).

As for the content, it seemed marginally more interesting than a regular debate; there was at least the potential to put the candidates in the hot seat, such as when a lesbian couple inquired as to why they shouldn’t be allowed to marry. If nothing else, it was a step in the right direction, although Politico found it highly ironic that the debate itself failed to produce a “YouTube moment.” Also not impressed were the folks over at Wonkette, who live-blogged the whole thing (read: sat at their computers and got drunk as the debate unfolded).

It’s kind of sad that I got this via the Agitator, but OC Alumn and all-around cool guy Mark Hemingway has a piece about Live Earth in NRO. The whole thing is golden, so read it, but I’ve excerpted a few of my favorite bits below.

12:59: Another PSA, this time horrendously exploited children prattling on about global warming. One very young girl bemoans that her children may never see a blue sky or green grass. It’s a full-frame closeup with tears streaming down her face. Naturally, this causes my wife to laugh uproariously. I knew there was a reason I married her.

5:55: John Mayer takes the stage. Mayer is Berklee College of Music grad and arguably the first virtuoso musician to take the stage today. Too bad he’s carved out a lucrative career by taking on the most thankless task in music — writing songs that simultaneously a) make sorority girls feel good about themselves (“Greg at Sigma Chi would never compare my body to a wonderland!”) and b) are non-threatening enough that make aging Grammy voters feel good about voting for someone under 30. For all of his technically impressive licks, every song the man writes makes my cochlea want to leap out of my head and dissolve themselves in a warm bucket of lye.

This describes, perfectly, exactly what is wrong with John Mayer.

Polling closed at 11:59 PM last night, and now it’s official: Springfield, Vermont is going to host the Simpsons’ movie premier

Dress up. According to the Southern District of Florida Blog, the jurors in the Jose Padilla trial showed their patriotic fervor (if not their commitment to giving Mr Padilla a fair trial) by dressing up for work yesterday. Apparently, one row of jurors dressed entirely in red, another in white and the third all in blue. What better way to prove you aren’t on the terrorist’s side? (Hat Tip: Volokh Conspiracy)

Pardon someone. Thanks to President Bush’s deep and abiding commitment to the principles which made this country great, Lewis “Scooter” Libby will have plenty to celebrate this independence day. As usual, Blogometer has a ton of blogosphere reactions, ranging from KLo’s renewed enthusiasm for the Bush presidency (ugh), to Earl Blumenauer’s comparison of Libby to Paris Hilton (double ugh). Get some perspective on the issue by checking out the Families against Mandatory Minimums list of people who actually deserve commuted sentences (via Hit and Run)

Release an intellectually dishonest movie about socialized health care. Except that it’s won’t make much money, even MTV won’t like it, and it will irritate anyone with half a brain.

Have a bong hit 4 Jesus. Just don’t do it at school. Or, just play Bong Hits 4 Jesus: The Game over at Students For Sensible Drug Policy. (via Hit and Run)

Check out the Daily Dish’s smorgasbord of reasons to love America.  Theyrange from video of Jimi playing the national anthem and “Freedom isn’t Free,” to Steinbeck and Whitman.

Get the hell off of your computer and enjoy the outdoors. Damn.