We may have damaged livers, but not damaged hearts. In partnership with the American Red Cross the Oregon Commentator is proud to present SudSquatch. All proceeds for the event will be donated to the Haiti reconstruction effort and low income families in Eugene that have been affected by flood or fire damage.

It only cost five dollars to spend a lovely Friday afternoon jamming out to Indubious and Sea Bell on the EMU lawn.  You can even charge it to your student account!

The UO is not exactly known for it’s republican fervor on campus, in fact they barely exist. We have the College Republicans, who haven’t updated their blog since 2006 and are rarely seen on campus. OSU however has a College Republican group that is prominent on campus and frankly kicks ass.

The group went all out last week in it’s annual Second Amendment week celebration. To convey the awesomeness of the event I’ll leave it to the facebook event page to give a proper description.

A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

Come join the Oregon State University College Republicans in a celebration of one of the most important rights we have as Americans.

Itinerary:
We are officially giving away an AR-15 rifle complete with hard case, 5 magazines, and 100 rounds of ammunition! We are also giving away a Benchmade Griptilian pocket knife. Buy your drawing tickets M-F, 10-4 in the MU quad.

Guest speakers: Kevin Starrett of Oregon Firearms Federation, 4th Congressional District candidate Jaynee Germond, and nationally syndicated talk show host Lars Larson will be in the MU quad on Friday, April 16, at 12pm!

FREE for students Gun Safety / Concealed Handgun License Class: Wednesday the 14th, 6pm, Milam Hall. Cost is $40 for non-students

Anyone interested is welcome to attend. We’ll be in the quad all week!

Now Lars Larson is not my cup of tea, but a raffle to win a AR-15 that is what I’m all about. Step up your game UO College republicans.

It looks like the ASUO elections season is starting to heat up, and Cpt. Lesiak hasn’t even made anyone walk the plank yet (his proposed Executive punishment for waste of student dollars). The Students for Responsible Government, a group that has existed for some time, seems rather angry about Tomcat’s article. Here’s what they had to say in an e-mail.

A few issues ago I wrote a “fake news story” about the Ol’ Dirty filling their news editor position with an orangutan named Pat. During a conversation with the Emerald’s business manager Kathy Carbone, she complimented me on the story as well as asked me, “It’s funny, but can you just write that? Or is there some kind of rules against writing fake, ridiculous quotes?” I told Kathy that anyone who thinks a chimp getting hired at a school paper is real was not worth my time. We never received any complaints.

Unfortunately, the same can not be said for the Vancouver Voice, ran by former OC editor-in-chief Ossie Bladine. In a section titled “Not Real News” they ran a fake story about a local business considering implementing casino games for children as part of their business model. Just wait, it gets better.

Apparently a local citizen called the Washington State Gambling Commission and the business is now under investigation. Now, I can understand Ossie’s problem of readers’ lazy eyes — I have read links to this very blog (mostly from Tea Party people who hate me) saying that “there’s not even an author to this blog!” when clearly, my name is directly under the title.

What is more confusing, however, is how on Earth anyone could think that a news organization like the Voice would run a straight news story about a children’s gambling establishment with no commentary or editorial substance. Is the generation gap becoming so large that The Onion is becoming a dividing line?

This is not the first time this year the Voice has had such confusion over a clearly labeled and clearly satirical article. In their Jan. 21 issue, the Voice ran a story about The Columbian changing its name to The Fort Vancouver Tribune. Apparently this caused some mental anguish for their readers, and Ossie had to formulate a very obvious, simply-worded note for his slower readers that read, We’d like to state that this was not quite real news–as in, we made it up.” 

In any case Ossie said, “From an outsider’s view, this is pretty funny. But for Big Al’s, a locally owned business that works hard to keep a family friendly image, not so funny.” But Ossie’s wrong, isn’t he? It’s not funny.

It’s absolutely hilarious.

Zachary Bucharest/The Vanguard

Now that the sun has started to shine, it inevitably means that Zach Vishanoff will break out his easel and get to work painting Eugene in bloom. As such, the state of Oregon will be requiring a new conspiracy theorist to take his place. Enter Professor John Hall of Portland State.

In an insane story, Hall has accused one of his students — a former Israeli Defense Forces member and contracted mercenary — of being an agent provocateur and an FBI informant.

It started when Zachary Bucharest brought a deconstructed and firing pin-less AR-15 to class for a presentation in November. After months of interaction with Bucharest, Professor Hall had decided he was dangerous to the PSU community. In January, Hall called Bucharest out during a class session, and presented a letter he’d written to the local FBI office.

In the letter, Hall makes several cliche, paranoid references like “As you would [already] know…” The story seemingly tangles itself considering Hall took a campus safety officer to class with him to “pat down” Bucharest — a violation of his privacy — to look for a gun (lets not forget OUS/PSU rules that violate the 2nd Amendment either).

As a result, Hall has been suspended with pay pending investigation into the matter. There are so many directions to go with this story, so much input it’s hard to know where to start. For starters, Bucharest brought an AR-15 to campus, violating PSU’s “rules” against firearms — a sticky situation in itself.

Then comes the attack by Hall, asking a campus officer to do an illegal search of Bucharest. Combine that with the fact that a tenured professor going off about a secret FBI informant in his midst is going to seem a little batshit crazy (even if he did somehow hit the secret hotspot).

For Christ’s sake, even if Bucharest is an FBI informant, what is Hall expecting with that letter? I’ll save you the long, rambling read but the professor ends his letter with a warning to the FBI that he will, “Inform my students’ parents of this likely threat.” Was Hall expecting the FBI to come out and say, “Wow. You really got us, John. We tried to slip it past you but you were too on the ball. Great job!”

This may be serious business a little farther north, but from where I’m sitting this is just plain funny.

(We apologize for the delay for the posters. Proper Facebook clearance was needed.)

Looks like the ASUO Elections season is underway! Here’s some sweet posters!

There has been quite a bit of talk lately about a growing political movement by newly-minted Constitutionalists called the “Tea Party movement”. It has been touted as a “grass roots rebellion” all over the conservative airwaves and news media, despite the huge names endorsing the ideas.

In an article by David Barstow, he describes the movement as being a separate mechanism away from the Republicans, and that it has a more “traditionally conservative” background.

“[A] significant undercurrent within the Tea Party movement that has less in common with the Republican Party than with the Patriot movement, a brand of politics historically associated with libertarians, militia groups, anti-immigration advocates and those who argue for the abolition of the Federal Reserve.”

Barstow’s article goes on to describe the aforementioned Constitutionalists as only recently coming to political awareness when they realized that “Washington was a threat”. Further, several of them mention the possible, if not probable, impending need for revolution, “Mrs. Stout said she felt as if she had been handed a road map to rebellion.” This theme of militias actually being called into action is widely apparent throughout Barstow’s article and in Tea Party ideals.

“In Indiana, Richard Behney, a Republican Senate candidate, told Tea Party supporters what he would do if the 2010 elections did not produce results to his liking: “I’m cleaning my guns and getting ready for the big show. And I’m serious about that, and I bet you are, too.”

What has essentially happened, however, is that the Tea Party movement has been touted so fervently by conservative media that it hardly qualifies as a grass roots movement. Last April, Fox News pushed for the Tea Parties so hard that it actually fabricated video footage in order to make a Tea Party seem larger.

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As the Pacifica Forum resolution finally passed Rules Committee on Wednesday, so too did it bring quite the controversy with it–and this time, no Nazis were present. Towards the end of the evening a bomb was dropped on the Senate (an odd happening in the same night the new ASUO logo had been debated) as tensions over a point of order rose to such that Senate Vice President Nicholas Schultz called for Senate President Nick Gower to resign by shouting, “Step down! Step down!”

The controversy started when Gower did not follow the speakers list–an ordered list for members to abide by–and instead called on Senator Lindsay Reichardt, out of turn. Schultz accused Gower of abuse of power, and called to question Gower’s action. Sens. McCafferty and Gower told Schultz he was not allowed to question that specific action of the Chair (Gower). Schultz, along with ASUO President Emma Kallaway, left the meeting for approximately 40 minutes and came back with a book of Robert’s Rules of Order–the governing rules the ASUO abides by.

From here, the situation escalated into a term I’m trying to coin here lately (patent pending)–a McDisasterfuck. Schultz had figured out that Gower and McCafferty were wrong, and that if two or more Senators called to question the actions of the Chair (Gower) then they could indeed discuss it.

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[Update] Phylicia Haggerty came to our office today and told us that she did not make this phone call.

Just received a phone call from some who claimed to be Phylicia Haggerty. Here’s how it went:

OC: Hello?

PH: Hi, my name is Phylicia. I just read something on your website I didn’t appreciate. Who am I talking to?

OC: Dane

PH: Alright well that e-mail was meant to be private. I didn’t send it to you, I meant for it to be between me and the [ASUO] Senate.

OC: Well it was sent to us by someone you communicated with. At that point in time, the e-mail he sent was his property.

PH: I meant for it to be private though. I don’t appreciate that.

OC: Well, I think that it really adds to the conversation about the Pacifica Forum. It’s already a part of the public domain.

PH: I’d rather it be taken down. Do you have a boss?

OC: Nope. I am the boss.

PH: Well I think it should be taken down. I never sent any of those to you.

OC: You never stated to anyone that you didn’t wish for them to be printed. Similarly, you actually did send us the second e-mail. You clicked “reply all” instead of just “reply”. You had prior knowledge of who you sent the e-mail to.

PH: I never meant for it to be published. Are you sure there’s no one else there I can talk to?

OC: Nope.

PH: So even if I come do there… where you guys at? Room 319?

OC: Yeah, I’ll be here if you want. The post will remain up though, it’s public information.

PH: So you’re not going to take it down?

OC: Nope. It says right on our masthead that we can print anything you send to us.

PH: Ok, well you’ll be hearing from me then.

OC: Ok.

I feel threatened, don’t you agree? I’m worried about my safety on campus, seeing as she knows where I am.

Here is Phylicia Haggerty’s reply to ASUO Sen. Tyler Griffin’s previous email:

“Tyler,

I appreciate you writing me back. To clarify a few things 1) I am not ignorant and 2) I never said ASUO members have never been discriminated against. I did say that most of you are probably not taking this situation seriously because based on who the Pacifica forum is gearing hatred towards most of you would not classify. I think it was very unprofessional for you to say and I quote “how dare me” and that I should be ashamed of what I said. I think it is truly sad that some of the ASUO members have to thought twice about an issue that is blatantly wrong. I think it is ironic that from what I said in my e-mail that you would have the audacity to claim that you are scared of me. It is too bad that this issue probably will not be resolved until someone gets hurt. I do apologize for saying that nothing has been done about this issue because I know most of you do understand and that you are trying to find a solution. I will not be contacting you on any other circumstances and I do appreciate your time because I know you are very busy. I did contact Student Affairs and I have falsely accused ASUO Senate members in that the policy decision making is not left up to you completely in that the President makes final decisions. Thank you again for your time.

Phylicia Haggerty”

At this point in time, since Griffin hasn’t responded to Haggerty (or hasn’t forwarded us his response) we might as well take a swing at this one. Let’s start with her first e-mail, one which is astoundingly hilarious in its authors minute grasp of rational thought, or a basic concept of the U.S. Constitution.

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Cattermole noticed this picture today in the Emerald. Take a look at what website our beloved ASUO Senate is looking at during their meeting.

haha Reagan is so life-like

Apparently the Pacifica Forum protesters discussed a rumor that the Oregon Commentator would, “Send 30 or 40 people to protest our protest of the Pacifica Forum.” Looks like they were wrong.

Apathy is a human right.

Tonight there was a Pacifica protest meeting at Cafe Roma. The Commentator was a seemingly unwelcome addition to the meeting when it was stated by one of the Black Tea Society affiliates wrapped in a particularly douchey bandana that, “Contributors to the Oregon Commentator have voiced their support of free speech by ANY means necessary.” This seemed a bit absurd to me. I believe the blog comment (not a staffer’s post) was:

“OC editors, I respect you: Call me on it if I’m wrong to be frustrated with the funding side. I support free speech, and would, indeed, fight to the death to protect the PF’s right to it. (Well, maybe not Marr. But the others? Sure.)”

The protesters on Friday were disorganized to say the least. They could not agree on what it was that they were protesting, let alone whether they were to be silent or disruptive. Fortunately, this was first thing on the agenda.

Cimmeron Gillespie wanted to emphasize that protesters against the forum should not associate their cause with the question of free speech. Gillespie made it very clear that the reason for the meeting was to plan an effective protest against what they believe to be a narrow-minded group with ties to one or more groups, such as Volksfront and Stormfront, who have an alleged history of violent bigotry.

“Again, this is a campus and student safety issue,” Gillespie continued. He then ran us all through the plan of attack for their protesting of the next Forum topic: Neo-Communism and the Anti-Hate Task Force (which, supposedly, targets one of Eugene’s own Lane County Board members. Pictures of him and other protesters from last Friday appear on the fliers). The plan consists of three parts:

1. Framing – Emphasize safety, not free speech.

2. Administration – Gillespie described the UO administration as, “A giant tractor with no engine. We have to pull and push and move it how we want.”

3. Forum – Develop a reasonable argument with constructive questions that will lead Billy Rojas and his followers to either “hang themselves up,” or realize the error of their ways.

Emma Kallaway put in her two cents, using her experience with the administration to her advantage. She thought that this whole fiasco is even more complicated than it seems. The fact that the University of Oregon is a public institution funded by the state and part of OUS (Oregon University System), iterates that the buck doesn’t stop with Dick Lariviere. Furthermore, to change policy regarding alumni, old professors and rights to the usage of OUS property is asking quite a bit.

As for the Pacifica Forum, hopefully they will have a chance to exercise their right to free speech this Friday. Personally, I can’t speak to the extent of their connections with violent groups and whether or not they are using Pacifica as a front for their “socialist recruiting machine.”

There will also be a Senate meeting in the Walnut Room on Friday at 7pm. The first ten minutes will consist of four people recalling their individual altercations with Pacifica attendees. The rest of the time is reserved for questions.

Those wishing to learn more about the issue are encouraged to attend and not ignorantly yell and scream like a fucking idiot.