The People vs. Tyler Graf
Tired of Tyler Graf’s highly offensive and controversial ODE columns ruining everything that Ailee Slater helped build over the past few years? Well, there’s finally a Facebook group you can join to help get this “hegemonic heterosexist” fired from the respected op/ed institution that is Page 2 of the Emerald. (Current member count: 3. Come on people!) Here’s the money quote:
His editorials are useless, and should only be used to line wastepaper baskets or litterboxes. Basically, he has been convicted of multiple counts of douchebagery.
“Douchebagery”! How do you respond to that charge, Mr. Graf?
Only two questions are left:
- Will a mere Facebook group be effective enough? The ODE braintrust might respond better to, say, an online petition.
- Who should the Emerald replace Graf with? My early choice is Mr. Jonah Darwish. Darwish, the third member of the Fire Graf group, lists the following interests in his Facebook profile:
Herb. Also, my dreads, my guitar, hippie babes, tye-dye, the Saturday Market, my hack, Ultimate, scoring free bagels, mellow conversation, mate (it’s like this Argentinian tea), the outdoors, Holy Cow, and veganism.
Think of the potential columns!
October 25th, 2006 at 12:14 pm
No comment. You can take it up with my publicist. Tom Cruise just fired her.
October 25th, 2006 at 12:17 pm
Make that FOUR members, Ian.
October 25th, 2006 at 2:01 pm
“Related groups: Habeas Corpus, RIP; Global Vegan Network; Bob Marley Fan Club; UO Maintenance Crew; Vegans.”
Sign me up!
October 25th, 2006 at 2:10 pm
If Mr. Graf has enemies like these he must be doing something right. Double his editorials, Emerald! Print them in 18-point font across the front page!
October 25th, 2006 at 4:34 pm
I can understand the charges of racism land heterosexism leveled against Mr. Graf, but the wild accusations of douchebaggery make a hollow mockery of our efforts in battling the scourge of global douchebaggery.
October 25th, 2006 at 5:02 pm
This Jonah guy can’t be serious:
“I’m a pretty laid back and chill guy. I’m way open-minded and shit; I respect all people’s beliefs and think there is no wrong religion (except maybe Christians). I’m, like, all for women’s rights and shit, and the environment and eco-feminism.”
October 25th, 2006 at 5:04 pm
Keep in mind, fellas, that not everyone on Facebook is who he or she says.
October 25th, 2006 at 5:08 pm
That does not mean that I AM anyone other than myself on Facebook, having relinquished my duties as a fictional mug of pilsner long ago. I haven’t taken on any identities since. Keep that in mind.
October 25th, 2006 at 7:13 pm
You godda love this Jonah guy, I know I do… but still, the first question should not be weather to remove Graft… it should be how to deal with Schwoefferman… as I would read Graft’s column any day over Schwoefferman’s. Maybe they should have a face off… then Graft would prove his mental and moral superiority over the other!
October 25th, 2006 at 7:37 pm
Who is this “Graft” fellow?
October 25th, 2006 at 8:30 pm
Sorry about the extra T
October 25th, 2006 at 8:51 pm
Now that’s a spelling mistake I’d expect an ASUO official to make.
October 25th, 2006 at 9:51 pm
Well at least Schoefferman’s piece wasn’t blatantly racist today. If I can go a day without racist statements made my people of color at the UO, that will be a good day.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:38 am
You guys shouldn’t belittle our movement with your insecure mockery. Tyler Graf gets away with publishing hate speech every week, and it has to stop.
And Andy, your the racist! Your the one who keeps mentioning peoples skin color and opposing diversity! Ty Schwoefferman is the best columnist the EMerald has. He raps about important stuff, like hate crimes on campus, Kolumbus day, and Eugene’s killer hip hop scene.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:39 am
By the way, how can I get a job writing columns at the Emerald?
October 26th, 2006 at 1:54 am
Jonah,
You get the job by licking the nutsack of Ryan Knutson.
October 26th, 2006 at 2:44 am
That’s just the reply I would expect from a heterosexist publication such as this one.
October 26th, 2006 at 5:50 am
Jonah: “You guys shouldn’t belittle our movement with your insecure mockery.”
Mockery? I’ve been calling Tyler an asshole for years now - usually in public and in a loud voice. No offense, Jonah, but y’all are amateurs.
“Tyler Graf gets away with publishing hate speech every week, and it has to stop.”
I knew there’d be a backlash coming from fans of the FCC. That’s a dangerous constituency to alienate.
October 26th, 2006 at 7:05 am
Duder: “This Jonah guy can’t be serious:”
See also: this.
[Made Clickable]
October 26th, 2006 at 10:10 am
I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Jonah. I can attest to his nominal existance.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:13 am
In order to get rid of Tyler we need to reinstitute some pro tar-and-feather legislation. Ill provide the feathers.
October 26th, 2006 at 11:14 am
Oh, and I forgot to mention:
seeriosly liek he is like soooooooooo mean. he totally hates on taylors all the time and like duz he evn go their?!?!?!?11? it is like SOOOO fun!!!!11!! N like my boyfrend is n a frat so liek not ALLL frat guyz r gay, k??????? he is totali gay for bein SUCH a homophob! the emerald shoud totally FIRE tylr graff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!1
October 26th, 2006 at 11:26 am
So I say that there is racial tension on campus and I’m a racist, but when Ty does it’s “rapping about important stuff.” Maybe it’s your group that publishes hate speech. Saying I’m a racist is hate speech in your definition. The only thing that should stop is you fucking socialist assholes trying to enslave me.
How bout that?
October 26th, 2006 at 12:00 pm
T: “Keep in mind, fellas, that not everyone on Facebook is who he or she says… I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Jonah. I can attest to his nominal existance.”
Very carefully worded, sir. After clicking around that group a little, I think it’s a stroke of genius.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:01 pm
Don’t belittle your movement? What “movement” is that again? The scoring free bagels and rapping with hippy chicks at the saturday market about the environmetal racism movement? And how does your movement define “environmental racism,” or “heterosexism” for that matter? Hell, there’s a scooby snack in it for you if you can give me definition of the word “diversity” that makes any sense.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:05 pm
dammit… I’ve been had. I should have known it. Anything that seems too good to be true usually is.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:19 pm
Yes, a stroke indeed. And it was carefully worded. I’ll carefully word this, too:
It is not me. Nope. But Jonah is a real dude.
October 26th, 2006 at 12:44 pm
A real dude with a real email address from the UO…
For shame, Stewart, For shame.
October 26th, 2006 at 1:01 pm
I think diversity is a racist term no matter when it is used. This Jonah guy is a “dush” bag; I met him once at a party, where he berated me for eating meat and then told me that I HAD to listen to “Anarchy Hour” on KWVA.
October 26th, 2006 at 1:19 pm
“Nominal” my ass! Don’t believe the right-wing lies of this publication. and Andy, how is calling you a racist a racist thing? Quit trying to mix people up with your doublethink!
October 26th, 2006 at 1:53 pm
This is possibly the most productive blog post I’ve ever made.
October 26th, 2006 at 8:33 pm
Ian, knowing you, I expected that remark. *chuckle*
October 26th, 2006 at 9:09 pm
Not to split hairs here, but “editorials” are written by the “editorial board” (a distinction I know the OCers are aware of - this is mostly for the newly media literate) and Tyler Graf is not a member of that club. Just an FYI.
October 27th, 2006 at 7:54 am
Although it is against my judgment to get involved, I am procrastinating the writing of a thesis chapter and this is the best way to do it:
Being “like, all for women’s rights and shit, and the environment and eco-feminism” is a paternalistic form of “heterosexism”. To truly embrace the movement, Jonah will have to start sleeping with men and renounce his preference for women.
That should work fine, because I can’t fathom this Jonah having the privilege of sexual relations with a woman. Not after saying “women’s rights and shit.” That’s like saying “Bitch, I’m going to 7-Eleven for some beer and shit.”
Women’s rights aren’t shit. They’re more like the elation that comes from scoring a stank sack of weed and chaining my disk on the first shot in Ultimate. The rush to my head from stealing… I mean scoring… a free bagel and giving it to street walkers that sleep at the foot of the Ken Kesey statue. Or the high I get from peepin the killer Hip-hop scene at the WOW Hall and stabbing some meat-eating mofo in the back for not respecting my chill hippie lady. Non-violence, yo. It’s the way of my vegan, tye-dye ancestors. Peace.
October 29th, 2006 at 12:19 pm
Hey Neums, are the ‘Ol Dirty Crowd allowed to post here? We’ve been a bit confused about that policy…
October 29th, 2006 at 3:47 pm
We all remember the Mindi Rice Debacle: Mindi, however, used a pseudonym to write some nasty things about the sports section, which she had formerly edited. When she posted those comments, she was working as an ODE copy editor, and I don’t think she was even a student. It was pretty obvious why she got fired.
Meghann, Jared and Sho (when he was at the ODE) used to post comments, back in the day. But they never got on here and said terrible things about their publication either.
October 29th, 2006 at 5:59 pm
There are good things to say about ‘Ol Dirty?
October 29th, 2006 at 8:54 pm
Wow, now the Oregon Commentator is supporting censorship of free speech too? Why would you support such oppression, T?
October 29th, 2006 at 8:56 pm
Hey Melissa, thanks for the kind words. You’ve really opened my eyes to my own bigotry; I can’t believe I’ve been such a heterosexist my entire life. I’ve decided to give men a go, too. You seem like a chill lady, by the way (I procrastinate too!). We should meet up sometime for tea. Facebook me.
October 29th, 2006 at 9:41 pm
Oh, I’ll facebook you, Jonah … you really understand what a woman wants.
October 29th, 2006 at 10:14 pm
Ted: They put out a daily, that’s tough work.
October 30th, 2006 at 7:40 pm
Schwoefferman has got a great new column in the Emerald today, in which he sticks it to the bigot Graf! Check it out. Oh, and I don’t know how to make clickable links yet; I’m new to this technology thing.
October 30th, 2006 at 8:22 pm
Poor Jonah.