Plus: Just last month, Moore got caught doing another push poll, and in in hilarious fashion.

Timbo: What your mother went through would be a “push poll.” I did those for the Republicans when I worked at Moore Information. They are a whole lot of fun:Q: If the election were held today, would you vote for Senator Conrad Burns, Republican, or Martha Jenkins, Democrat?
A: I think I’m going for Jenkins.
Q: Okay. If I were to tell you that Ms. Jenkins has been alleged to drown her neighbors’ cats if they enter her yard, how would you vote if the election were held today?
A: Gosh, I hadn’t heard about that. I guess I’m undecided.
Q: Good. I might add that she allegedly once ran off with a 12 year old student of hers to Atlantic City, and later bore his child.
A: Oh my.
Q: Uh huh. And get this: she drowned that child with the cats. Er, allegedly.
A: Oh No!
. . . and so on.

And you’re right about the pronunciation problem; I got in a lot of trouble with Colorado voters for mangling “Arapaho County.” I suppose the answer is to outsource all call center work to India, where they speak better English than we do.

Mom: Hello?
Survey guy: Would you mind taking a short political survey?
M: Sure.
S: As a registerd Oregone-ian voter in the city of Portland, have you decided who you will vote for in the upcoming Portland city council election?
M: Oregonian. And no, not yet. I haven’t researched the city council candidates.
S: That’s fine. Would you agree with this statement? “Nick Fish is a stand-up guy who will bring Portland the peace and prosperity it needs as a member of city council, and who possesses one fine head of hair?”
M: I don’t know; like I said, I haven’t researched the candidates yet.
S: Don’t worry about it. Maybe you will agree with this statement: “Sam Adams is a viscious killer who, as a member of city council, will drown each family’s firstborn child in the Will-a-met River?”
M: What the hell? I thought this was a survey, not a transparent endorsement of Nick Fish!

Of course it’s always possible that Sam Adams hired the survey crew to paint a black mark on Nick Fish, so I can clearly not pick the glass in front of you.